How to get over a relationship breakup- 15 steps to heal

Relationship breakup is hard and it could be dangerous if you didn’t handle it rightly. A breakup may lead you to anxiety, stress and at the worst stage to depression. To protect you from this relationship breakdown we come with 15 steps to heal from a breakup. These facts and steps are based on research and personal experience. Let’s start our journey to get over a relationship breakup.

15 steps to get over a breakup

Blue Green and Orange Hand Drawn Biography and Process Infographic by Shivam Gautam

1. Make a decision

All start with your decision-making, without a doubt it is a tough decision to take but you need to make it to move on. Now you have to take a decision whether to move on or suffer from this relationship. You need to choose one direction(to go away from them or go for them).

And if you choose to move on from this breakup, then you need to complete this article, otherwise, you may suffer the pain.

2. Accept the truth

Now, when you choose to move on from this breakup, you need to accept that the person you were trying to reach is not available for you. Maybe this is harsh, but you need to accept that they are gone from your life and to wait for them is not an option.

It will be better you don’t play games instead take responsibility that things are not working for your relationship. You need to forgive yourself as well as your partner. Forgiveness is the first step to healing.

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3. Cut them from social Media

You need it right now when you take the decision to move, take it completely. Maybe it could be hard to remove them from your social media but you need to do it. If you don’t do it, you will suffer every time you see their activity on social media and it becomes hard for you to move on from the breakup.

If the relationship is over, the ease of communication only prolongs the frustration and hurt. To Block or remove them from social media prevents you from a memory trap of that person. If possible, take a break from social media.

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4. Remove painful memory 

There are many things that remind you of them, you need to remove them at least for some time. Such as chats, pictures, places or songs. It may be hard but you need to do it to prevent you from an emotional breakdown in the future.

Delete their memories from mobile and desktop, before you want to delete them from your life. Take a screenshot of your last chat and delete all chats, last screenshot belongs to your self-respect and helps you not to talk to them as what happened last time. Last chat also helps you to stay on the promise that you made to yourself at last time.

If a place reminds you of them, try to make a distance from that point for some time. Try to delete or make a distance that reminds you of your ex.

5. Identify trigger point

At first, when you choose to move on from a breakup, you could take a quick decision but after some time things may be tense. And, there will be some moment that reminds you of them.

Maybe at night, you may feel that you need them right now and can’t live without them. Try to avoid that trigger point, it will be better to watch a movie or get busy with something at that time with some supportive people.

Try to identify those trigger point that reminds you of them, try to distract you from those point. Surround yourself with supportive people at that time. Spend that time with your family and friends.

6. Try to fill the empty void

it is genuine, when you lost a person from your life, you feel their absence and its haunts you. Don’t look for a new person or relationship in hurry, it will be better to fill the empty void with whatever you have, i.e your, friends, family, kids, passion or hobby.

7. Don’t go for another toxic relationship just to escape from a breakup

Just stop, if you thinking to do as. This may only add toxicity to your life and resulted in it ends in more pain. Many of us do that and ended with more pain in life. First of all, you need to heal yourself from this breakup then you will be allowed to have a relationship.

And the realistic fact is just after a breakup you are not in the state of making any better relationships. Maybe you choose a more vulnerable person this time or you become toxic for another person to handle.

When you enter into a relationship too soon after breaking up with someone, you may be masking your negative emotions with the excitement of a new relationship, and things are not working for both relations.

Give some time to yourself, spend some quality time with the people you have in life, and remember don’t take any decision in hurry.

Related: How to deal with toxic peoples

8. Don’t wait for a miracle

Remember, no miracles will happen and they will never come back in your life. Don’t give yourself the false hope that things will go well on their own.

Nothing will happen if you do nothing, this is your life and your bad patch, only your efforts could help you to live beautiful life again. Don’t wait for an angel that will come to you and heal you, take the responsibility to make things correct.

9. Use your energy in a positive way

Do you ever witness after a breakup a person start spending more time in Gym? Yes, they are using their anger and frustration in a positive way.

A breakup can signify a new beginning. Try to use your energy in a positive way. Try to use this energy and time on the things that you have wanted for a long time. Engage yourself in a life goal, it could be anything from your wishlist, i.e. your career, health, wealth, hobby, passion or your creative side.

Through yourself in a tight pack schedule where you don’t get enough time to think about the breakup and move on.

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10. Remember everything in your life is like before except your status

Yes, your relationship status is changed but expect this everything is the same in your life. We feel that everything is gone from our lives and we are the only ones who live our lives alone.

But everything is the same, your friends are still yours, your family is still with you, your god is still with you and everything is there where it was before.

Nothing is finished, you could start your life again with the same enthusiasm. Take help from people in your life, they will definitely be your help.

11. Don’t miss a chance of any social gathering

Enjoy every social gathering or function that happens in your family, relative, or neighborhood, try to create little happiness. If possible organize a get-together for your friends at your place. Play with kids or your friends.

If you get a chance for a trip, don’t miss it enjoy every bit of it, whether it is solo or with friends.

12. Don’t play a victim card

You are not a victim, who suffers a mishappening. You suffer a breakup just because things are not working for you. Your sympathy eater attitude may spoil your future relationships too.

You don’t need to play a victim card, you just got sympathy by act like a victim. If you need to be loved you need to be strong, no one loves a guy who is a sympathy eater.

13. Love yourself more than ever

You need it most at the moment. Take care of yourself in every possible way. Take care of yourself physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

But people after a breakup start to avoid taking care of themselves and it weakens them physically and emotionally. You should make sure that you are eating well, sleeping enough, getting regular exercise and do something to reveal stress to feel your best.

Related: 30 ways to love yourself

14. Find a person with the same vibration

A person with the same vibration is someone whose emotions are similar to you. When you are ready, find a person with the same vibration and don’t do that in hurry. Take proper time, Love is beautiful if it happens to the right person.

Life becomes beautiful when you get attached to a person who understands you.

15. Don’t do

These thing many of people do to escape from breakup but it takes them to another bad habits.

So, please don’t do-

  1. Smoking/drinking
  2. Get in another relationship to escape from the breakup
  3. Don’t use another person just for your purpose, they have emotion too.
  4. Don’t let your negative emotion to take charge on you.

Related: How to give up a bad habit

Take the help of mental health professional if things are not working for you. Find out how they will guide you?

The best book to move on from a breakup “The wisdom of broken heart

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